Cultural Identity
One of the early Christian missionaries, Paul, was a TCK. When Paul was taken into protective custody, and the arresting officer asked who he was, Paul replied, “I am a Jew, from Tarsus in Cilicia,…” (Acts 21:39). That is, Paul’s parents’ “passport culture” was Jewish, but he was born in Tarsus, a Roman city in what is now southeastern Turkey. Tarsus had a famous university in Paul’s day so that the people there were greatly influenced by Greek thought. In fact, Tarsus, Athens (in Greece), and Alexandria (in Egypt) were three leading cities of the day. Antony and Cleopatra first met on the banks of the river which divides Tarsus.
As a child Paul was heavily influenced by several cultures, the Jewish culture at home, the Roman culture in which he lived, and the Hellenistic culture (mixture of the classic Greek and Oriental cultures) from which he got the language he spoke as a child and the university community there. He spoke Greek fluently as shown by the fact that when he spoke to the arresting officer, he did so in Greek—and before that the officer thought that Paul was an Egyptian leader of 4000 terrorists (Acts 21:38).
Paul also spoke Aramaic, kind of a colloquial Hebrew, and later asked the officer if he could speak in it to the mob from whom he was being protected. Probably as a teenager, Paul had been sent to Jerusalem where he mastered the Old Testament and became devoted to his Jewish faith. As he began speaking to the crowd, he mentioned the cultures that were a part of his identity. He mentioned that he was a Jew, born in Tarsus, and lived in Jerusalem. Fluent in at least three languages and modes of thought, Paul was a TCK who had a strong cultural identity and was proud of all aspects of it.
Of course, gaining identity as being an adult in the culture was clearly marked at particular ages. Both the Jews and the Romans had specific ceremonies which indicated that the children had become adults.
Jews
Even today most people have heard of the Jewish bar mitzvah for men and bat mitzvah for the women, literally becoming a son (or daughter) of the commandment. Although this became a formal ceremony only in later times, the Talmud makes it clear that men of 13 and women of 12 were old enough to perform adult actions having religious and legal implications. The parents were responsible for their sons until the age of 13 and their daughters until the age of 12, but from then on their offspring were considered adults, responsible for their own actions.
The symbol of the boy attaining maturity is being called up to read the Torah. The first time the Torah is read following his thirteenth birthday, the young man performs this act as the first public demonstration of his new role as a full adult member of the community. As noted in Chapter 1, after the father is called to read Torah, he recites the benediction, “Blessed is He who has now freed me from the responsibility of this one.” From this time on the new man is required to put on tefillin for the morning prayers. Also called phylacteries, the tefillin are small leather cases containing particular Scriptures worn by Jewish men (never boys) on their foreheads and left arms.
Although Paul may not have had that ceremony at the age of 13, he, like Jesus and other men of that day, became a man at 13. We sometimes wonder how Mary and Joseph could have left 12-year-old Jesus behind in Jerusalem and not even miss him for a whole day. We must remember that in less than a year Jesus would have been an adult in his society, old enough to own property and marry. Socially he was the equivalent of a 17-year-old in America today.
Romans
Most of us are not as familiar with Roman customs through which young men and women became adults, but in the Roman culture they became adults at about the same ages. From the time they were about a week old, the children wore small trinkets called bullas around their necks, probably to ward off evil spirits. At that time, their names were entered in the public registers of Rome, something like our birth records today. Most of us have heard of the Romans wearing togas, and as each of the toddlers became a child, he began wearing a toga pratexta.
About the time the boys reached their sixteenth year, they became adults as well. On March 16, a day called Liberalia, solemn ceremonies were held to celebrate this. At home each boy laid symbols of his childhood on the family altar, and these included his favorite toys and his bulla which he had worn since he was named. He also exchanged his toga pratexta for a toga virilis which symbolized his growth to manhood. This ceremony at home was followed by more imposing public one at the forum.
Thus, the change from childhood to adulthood was clear. By simply looking at whether or not an individual was wearing a bulla and a toga, one could tell if the person was a child or an adult. Expectations and responsibilities were clear for everyone. Unfortunately, things are not as clear in modern western culture.
USA Today
Some people have proposed that high school graduation is an adulthood ceremony. On a warm summer day the 18-year-old adolescents dress up in black robes and proceed one by one across a platform in front of the others their age with families and friends present. As each one approachs the person in charge, he or she moves some strings from one side of the head to the other and is given a special piece of paper. Everyone cheers and congratulates. However, this does not mean that they will all be treated as adults by the other adults in the society. About half of them will remain in school for several more years, prolonging their adolescence.
One day walking past a display in a high school, I noticed a small, dark blue, folder which said “Passport to Adulthood” with an eagle symbol on the front. Since it looked like a passport and I was interested in adolescence, I picked it up. Then I noticed that the words “Selective Service System” circled the eagle. Opening it I found the words, “MEN: When you reach 18, you become an adult. With that new status come rewards—and responsibilities. One of the first responsibilities you’ll have is to register with Selective Service.” Registering meant that they might soon be drafted into the armed forces and required to fight overseas.
If only it were that simple and clear when you become adults. Unfortunately, we have no particular age or ceremony that makes people adults. Here are a few of the wide variety of ages at which people are considered adults in different situations.
Since these ages at which people are considered adults vary from state to state and from situation to situation, teenagers frequently are confused and frustrated about whether or not they are adults. For example, teens may have a full driver’s license in one state, but when they move to another state, they cannot even get a permit to drive with a parent. Simply walking from room to room in a motel may change you from adult to child. In the restaurant, you are an adult at 12, but at the front desk you are a child until you are 18, and in the bar you are a child until you are 21. It is amazing that the final passage into adulthood has changed from the “bar mitzvah” to just the “bar.”
Finding Identity
Unable to get an adult identity from our culture, many adolescents turn to other ways to feel like adults, like part of society. However, none of these ways give a really lasting identity. Some of the things that people try are examples.
Of course, none of these give a satisfying, lasting adult identity to most people in our culture. The only thing that gives such an identity is reaching the age at which one is treated as an adult by others in the culture. That usually occurs after graduation from high school or graduation from college.
What can adolescent TCKs do?
Since adolescence is now an integral part of our culture, you cannot bring about change of the whole culture while you are an adolescent. However, you can probably bring about change in your family, perhaps in your church (at least in the youth group), and even in your school (if it is a rather small private one). Here are some suggestions.